At the afternoon (mincha) service on Yom Kippur, we read the Book of Jonah. Jonah is an unusual prophet. He is reluctant and tries to avoid God’s instructions. He addresses his message to non-Jews. After succeeding, he becomes distressed that the citizens of Nineveh actually listen and sincerely repent.
Most of us assume that the story is read to stress the possibility of repentance: the people of Nineveh repent from their sins and are saved from destruction. But there may be another reason we read this book on Yom Kippur, just before the gates begin to symbolically close during the ensuing Neilah service: Jonah represents us. Like Jonah, we are reluctant to face up to the demands that are made of us, even when they are proper and appropriate. Sometimes it seems that the responsibility is too great, but other times we become fearful of failure, or fearful of success.
We are like Jonah when we are filled with doubt, and we are like Jonah when we brood about the consequences of our own actions. Like Jonah, our faith is tested, and our faith does not always receive a passing grade. We are like Jonah when we are forced to confront our fears. We may try to run, but Yom Kippur forces us to stop and look inside of ourselves, and ask, as the sailors ask Jonah, “Who are you?”
Like the Book of Jonah, Yom Kippur does not end with certainty. At the Book’s conclusion, Jonah repeats that he would rather die than live. He remains unclear why his mission was undertaken and uncertain as to why it succeeded. At the very end of the Book, God instructs Jonah on the need for mercy ("Should I not spare the city of Nineveh with 120,000 inhabitants?") We do not hear Jonah's response; the Book ends with ambiguity.
We, too, are left with ambiguity. How will we be judged? Jonah didn’t know, and neither do we. However, we do have something which Jonah lacked: hope that things will be for the best. I offer my own hope to you and yours that the coming year will be for all of us one of health, happiness, sustenance, and a growing awareness of who we are and who we want to be.