Vayishlach
Gen. 32:4 - 36:43
Précis: As he nears his return to his homeland, Jacob sent (vayishlach) messengers to Esau to ascertain Esau’s state of mind after their 20-year separation. While he awaits a reply, Jacob encounters an “adversary” (most assume an angel) with whom Jacob wrestles through the night. As dawn breaks, the adversary announces that Jacob’s name is to be changed to Israel: “He who wrestles with God.” On the following day, Esau approaches, and despite Jacob’s fears, there is a happy reunion.
We then read the story of how a local prince rapes Dinah, Jacob’s daughter, and then asks to marry her. Jacob agrees on condition that all of the men of the city are circumcised. While the men are recovering, Jacob’s sons Simon and Levi attack the city and kill all of the inhabitants in revenge for the insult to their sister.
Jacob soon travels to Beth-el (the site of his ladder dream), and on the way, Rachel gives birth to Benjamin and dies in childbirth. Thereafter, Isaac’s death is noted, as is his burial by Esau and Jacob. The parasha ends with a genealogy of Esau and his descendants.
Gen. 33:4 “And Esau ran to meet Jacob, and embraced him, and fell on his neck, and kissed him; and they wept.”
After two decades of separation, the twin brothers meet again and are reconciled. The closeness of their relationship is questionable. While the Sages provide extended midrash seeking to cast doubt on Esau's sincerity, the text itself portrays a legitimate and sincere reunion. Yet, they need to live apart. Two people who tricked and threatened each other have finally come to accept the other. What has changed?
We recall that as young men, they competed with each other for the love of their parents, and each was successful in earning the love from only one of them. Jacob desired Esau’s birthright, Esau wanted the porridge and then wanted the blessing from Isaac. They each wanted what the other possessed.
When they meet again, they have overcome their jealousy. They both have large families and great wealth. Jacob offers his brother gifts, and Esau refuses. Jacob insists on the gift. Each of the two now understands that they no longer need envy the other.
As we see so often in our text, relationships among family members can be difficult. But as a wise woman (my wife) has repeatedly reminded me, “Never burn your bridges.” There is always hope for reconciliation. Another lesson: while we all strive for goals, we need to remember that life is not a zero-sum game. We also need to remember how blessed we already are, and that we should rejoice in our own achievements instead of being envious of the success of others.
