In honor of my wife of 50 years

It is with great joy and gratitude that I prepared this d'var in honor of the 50th wedding anniversary this Shabbat to my wonderful wife Abby.

Re’eh

Deut. 11:26 - 16:17

 

Précis: Moses begins by quoting God, saying “Behold (re’eh), I set before you a blessing and a curse this day.” The blessing flows from observance of the laws and the curses result from violations. A concern with idolatry permeates the following verses. The parasha explains that there will be a single site for sacrifices. A test for a false prophet and the punishment of an idolatrous city are included. The parasha then shifts to other subjects: a prohibition against self-mutilation, the biblical basis of the laws of kashrut, tithing so that the needs are met for the Levites, the "stranger, the fatherless, and the widow.” Remission of debts, freeing of Hebrew slaves, and the dedication of firstborn cattle are discussed, as are the commandments for the observance of Passover, Shavuot, and Sukkot.

 

Deut. 11:26–28 “Behold I set before you a blessing and a curse this day; a blessing if you obey the commandment…and a curse, if you will not obey the commandments…”

            The Hebrew verbs are very important in this verse: “behold” (re’eh) is a singular verb, and the phrase “before you” (“lif’neichem”) is plural. We begin with the singular and end with the plural. According to the Talmud, the mitzvot were given to the Jews as a single group (hence the singular verb), but the phrase ends with a plural to remind us that each individual must decide whether to accept the blessing or the curse.

Accepting the “rules” is necessary for any organization. Putting the interests of the community above one’s own needs is essential for success.

The same is also true – in fact even more true - in a successful marriage. After 50 years of marriage to my wife Abby, we’ve learned one most important lesson: it is not what matters between us, but rather that we deal with all matters together. Marriage is not for the weak, but rather for the strong. It takes strength of character, strength of caring, and the ultimate strength of love to cede one’s wants and needs to maintain the glorious partnership we call marriage.

When we conclude the reading of a Book of the Torah, we chant “Hazak, Hazak, v’nitkazek.” This may be translated as “Be strong, be strong, and let us strengthen one another.” As Abby and I close the Book of the first 50 years of our marriage, so may it be with us. 

Are we grasshoppers as well?

 Sh’lach

Num. 13:1-15:41

 

Précis: Moses is ordered to “send out” (sh’lach l’cha) spies to examine the land. Representatives of each tribe go out, report on its bounty, but also report about its fearsome inhabitants. The People are frightened, and their “murmuring” turns into something close to panic. God tells Moses that He will destroy the People, but Moses intercedes; the People are sentenced to spend 40 years in the wilderness. The parasha then returns to matters concerning the Tabernacle, with a discussion of the offering for unintentional sins. Near its end, the parasha discusses the wearing of tzitzit, a paragraph which is part of the traditional recitation of the Sh’ma. This is the 27th of 54 parshiot, marking the half-way point in the yearly reading.

 

Num. 13:33 “We looked like grasshoppers to ourselves, and so we must have looked to them.”

God has decided that the generation which left Egypt lacks the necessaries to enter the Promised Land. After all, there has been nothing but murmuring and complaints. The miracles they have seen and experienced are insufficient to provide the faith needed to enter the land.  Another generation is needed. But is even another generation sufficient to instill faith? Much can happen in a single generation.

And that brings us to today's Supreme Court rulings. For more than two generations, a woman's control of her body has been a constitutional right. Now this current Court, packed with two stolen Justices by Mitch McConnell, has decided that this constitutional right is to be eliminated. And at a time of unprecedented mass shootings, this Court has eased state regulation of guns, by somehow finding that the 2nd Amendment allows people to carry guns outside of their homes.

Many of us today feel like the spies, who saw themselves as grasshoppers, unable to take any action. What can we do? Are we condemned to wait for another generation to arise to protect the rights of women and to protect our very lives? I wish I knew.