Accepting Criticism

D’varim

Deuteronomy 1:1 - 3:22

Précis: The Book of Deuteronomy (D’varim – “words”) which we begin to read this week takes the form of a series of lectures by Moses to the People as they prepare to enter the Land. Together, these instructions constitute Moses’ farewell address. D’varim is sometimes called the “Mishneh Torah”, literally, the “second teaching of the Torah” (this is where we get the Greek name of the Book) because it contains repetitions of previously enunciated laws. The Book has a strong focus on the centrality of the Temple in the Promised Land, as well as many of other rituals found at the center of Jewish life: recitation of the Sh’ma, Birkat Hamazon, Shabbat observance, wearing tallit and tefillin, reciting kiddush on Shabbat, and placing mezuzot on doorposts.

            The first parasha recounts the four decades of travel through the wilderness, repeats the story of the spies, deals with the appointment of judges, victories in the wilderness against enemies, and how the conquered land is to be divided. This parasha is usually read on the Shabbat prior to the fast of Tisha B’Av. Since looking at history is a major theme of the parasha, it is certainly an appropriate reading prior to this holiday.

Deut. 1:1 “These are the words that Moses addressed to all Israel on the other side of the Jordan….”

            Rabbi Bradley Shavit Artson  has written about the use of the word “addressed” (diber) in this first sentence of the Book of D’varim (MyJewishLearning.com, 7/21/15) Usually, he notes, the verb ‘d-b-r“ implies harshness or rebuke, while the simple word for “speak” is “amar” and usually connotes a sense of praise. Why does Moses rebuke the People at the outset of the Book? Perhaps because the speech takes the form of powerful criticism of how the Israelites failed, time and again, to trust in him or in God through their wilderness travels

            How this “rebuke” was received is telling. When Moses completes his diatribe, he dies, and the Israelites mourn  his passing.

            Let’s transpose that reaction to today. In the midst of a brutal political campaign, it’s rare that a candidate will criticize the voters. (On the other hand, criticism of the opponent is ever-present.) Just imagine how resentful we would be if the candidate reminded us of our failures as a people.

            The ability to accept criticism (when merited) was viewed by the sages as one of the most important of virtues, one which was rare indeed. Rabbi Eleazar ben Azariah said, “… I doubt if there is anyone in this generation who is able to receive rebuke.” He noted that people of his time could not accept criticism as an act of love, but instead would lash out at those who pointed to their flaws.

            A true friend or parent or colleague is willing to point out the errors of judgment or action we all make, and we should depend on them to help us see what we really don’t want to see in ourselves. Hearing criticism is never easy, but being open to it is necessary if we are to overcome the faults we each have.

            One reaction by a person unwilling to accept criticism is, to use the current vernacular, to “double down” by asserting that the erroneous action or statement was correct, and then the critic is attacked by any means necessary. This reaction is profoundly at odds with Jewish tradition. Instead, we need to be open to criticism which is well-intentioned and offered in the hope of helping a fellow human being.