Friday, November 18, 2022

Respect

 Chayye Sarah

Gen. 23:1-25:18

 

Précis: The parasha begins with the counting the days of the life of Sarah (Chaye Sarah) and with her death. It continues with a detailed description of the purchase of the cave of Machpela by Abraham for a family burial site. Abraham orders his servant to go to Abraham’s ancestral home to obtain a wife for Isaac, and after a series of fulfilled signs, the servant finds Rebecca. Rebecca returns with the servant; she and Isaac meet, fall in love at first sight, and become man and wife. The parasha ends with the death of Abraham, and his burial by Isaac and Ishmael in the family plot.

 

Gen. 24:1-10 “Abraham said to his servant, the elder of his house, that ruled over all he had...that ​‘You shall not take a wife for my son from among the daughters of Canaan, where I dwell, but you shall go to my country, and my kindred, and take a wife for my son Isaac.’ ... And his servant swore to him concerning the matter.”


My friend, Shlomo Ressler, has written beautifully on this particular verse (Weekly D’var, 11/12/14). He notes that Abraham instructs his servant to find a wife for Isaac in his homeland. Why does Abraham prefer a wife from his birthplace for his son Isaac rather than a woman from Canaan? Both were places of idolatry, and Abraham and Isaac were living in Canaan. Would it not have been easier to find a wife nearby?

       Ressler cites Rabbenu Nissim who provides an answer. In Canaan, people mistreated each other. In Abraham’s birthplace, they may have sinned against God (through idol worship), but nevertheless there was respect and love between people. Abraham saw that people in his homeland observed Derech Eretz (respect). And it is respect that is a prerequisite to any lasting relationship​ ​between people.

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